Emotional Well-Being
How big do our morning or evening routines need to be to count towards our well-being? In this episode, Taylor Pahl and Erin Gaines of Campus Mind Works discuss the benefits of treating wellness like a muscle and the imperfect well-being we should strive for. Listen in and learn all the ways Campus Mind Works can help provide you with strategies, literacy, and opportunities to improve your mental health and emotional well-being.
Give this episode a listen and let us know what you think! Follow GradWell and join us on our journey to greater well-being for graduate students at the University of Michigan.
Guests
Erin Gaines, M.S.W., LLMSW
Erin Gaines, M.S.W., LLMSW, is the outreach and education program coordinator at the Eisenberg Family Depression Center. After relocating to the University of Michigan to earn her Master of Social Work, she graduated in 2022 with a focus on integrated health, mental health, and substance abuse. Erin holds a limited master’s license and is working toward full licensure as a part-time outpatient therapist. With a passion for both macro- and micro-level social work, she has gained valuable experience in health education, community mental health, substance use harm reduction, and various diversity, equity, and inclusion research projects. In her current role, Erin is dedicated to expanding mental health awareness, reducing stigma, and enhancing access to mental health services for youth and college students through educational programming and community-building initiatives.
Taylor Pahl, M.S.W., LMSW-C
Taylor Pahl, M.S.W., LMSW-C, specialist for outreach and education programs with the Eisenberg Family Depression Center, received her Master of Social Work from the University of Michigan and holds her license in clinical social work in the State of Michigan. Taylor has worked in the mental health field in various capacities and is committed to raising awareness, reducing stigma, and increasing help-seeking among the general population. At the Depression Center, Taylor is responsible for facilitating the Campus Mind Works wellness groups that provide psychoeducation and support for college student mental health, assisting with the Peer-to-Peer Depression Awareness Program that is a peer-based mental health program for middle and high school students, helping to plan the national Mental Health on College Campuses Conference, and providing mental health education trainings as requested. In addition to her role at the Depression Center, Taylor provides therapy for adolescents and young adults through a private practice.
Resources
- Campus Mind Works
- Depression Center Toolkit
- MiTalk Self-Help Resources
- CAPS
- Wolverine Support Network
- Stressbusters app
- Calm app
- Something small to do right now for your emotional well-being: Treat yourself to some calm in a wellness zone in the Michigan Union (4th floor), Pierpont Commons (lower level), or Munger Residence Hall (lower level)
Transcript
Sam Hobson:
Hey, welcome to GradWell, a limited series podcast that explores various ways the University of Michigan can support its graduate students in their journey to greater well-being in our everyday lives, brought to you by Rackham Graduate School. Each episode will explore a different dimension of well-being by interviewing a resource on campus that can help you thrive a little better. I’m Sam Hobson, a PhD candidate and a GSSA in Rackham’s Professional Development and Engagement Office. My fellow grad students, it’s time we start placing as much importance on ourselves as we do our work. You’re worth the effort.
Taylor Pahl:
Grad school is already such an investment. Don’t we want to show up in a way that feels better for us? And I would argue, yeah.
Sam Hobson:
Hello. Hello.
Taylor Pahl:
Hi.
Sam Hobson:
On today’s episode… Hi. On today’s episode, we’re going to be talking about emotional well-being with two guests from Campus Mind Works at the Eisenberg Family Depression Center, Erin Gaines, the outreach and education program coordinator, and Taylor Pahl, the senior outreach and education program specialist. I’m excited to have y’all with Taylor and Erin and me today. Okay, we’re going to jump in. So Taylor and Erin both used to be one of us. Erin earned her master of social work at the University of Michigan in 2022 with a focus on integrated health, mental health, and substance abuse. She holds a limited master’s license and is working toward full licensure as a part-time outpatient therapist. With a passion for both macro and micro social work, she has gained valuable experience in health education, community mental health, substance use harm reduction, and various diversity, equity, and inclusion research projects.
Taylor also received her master of social work from the University of Michigan, and she holds her license in clinical social work in the state. She has worked in the mental health field in various capacities and is committed to raising awareness, reducing stigma, and increasing help seeking among the general population. In addition to her role at the Depression Center, Taylor provides therapy for adolescents and young adults through a private practice. It’s a pleasure to have both of you here with me today. To start, can we learn a bit more about how you both got into these roles?
Taylor Pahl:
Definitely. This is Taylor. I actually wound up at the Eisenberg Family Depression Center when I was a grad student for my work study. I was getting my master’s in social work, and this work study opportunity seemed to fit really well in my interest area of mental health, right? I think it’s so important. But I just remember really a sense of community that the wellness groups for Campus Mind Works had and the opportunity for students to connect in an informal drop-in way. And it was during that time that I realized just how critical mental health education is because there’s still just a lack of understanding and stigma associated with mental health. And it’s really hard to seek out help if we’re not even sure what we’re experiencing or-
Sam Hobson:
Right.
Taylor Pahl:
… what our difficult emotions even are.
Sam Hobson:
Right.
Taylor Pahl:
So luckily, after graduation, I was offered a full-time position with the outreach and education team where all of our programming is really focused on increasing mental health literacy, reducing stigma, and increasing help seeking. So started in grad school and now I’m here, which is very exciting.
Sam Hobson:
That’s cool. Honestly, the idea of mental health literacy is not something that has been sort of in the forefront of my consciousness of something that exists. To become more literate in mental health is definitely something I want to take away from this. Yeah.
Taylor Pahl:
My hope is that you do, because I just want to reiterate, how am I supposed to ask for help if I’m not totally sure what’s even going on? Right? And I just think that awareness and that education is so important for all of us even to support our peers, or our family members, or our loved ones.
Sam Hobson:
Yeah.
Erin Gaines:
Absolutely. So this is Erin. I kind of attribute to how I got here to kind of how I started my bachelor’s degree. So actually, it wasn’t mental health related. I started healthcare management, but at that time, I was starting to take a lot of classes on social determinants of health, and it really interested me because it was helping me put to words and research really how our social conditions influence overall health. And so it really started to get me to think about mental health and our built environment. And so during those years, I actually worked as a health educator on my college campus, and I joined a peer health education program to teach other students about health and mental health. After grad school, I worked full-time as a therapist, and it wasn’t until recently that I really made the switch to work as a therapist, but full-time really getting into outreach and education.
And so I think education is just a really powerful tool for us to take control of our mental health and advocate for ourselves. And kind of like you were saying too, mental health literacy is an intentional practice and sometimes it’s not always as accessible. So I think it’s really helpful to have programs like these, and I feel very grateful to be a part of the team.
Sam Hobson:
Both of you have your masters in social work and your licenses as social workers. So I have a two part question here. What are your individual definitions of well-being? And can we discuss how and why those definitions may differ?
Taylor Pahl:
I’m going to be honest, I cheated on this. I was sitting there being like, what is my individual definition of well-being? And I found it really hard. I’m not going to lie.
Sam Hobson:
Yeah.
Taylor Pahl:
So I was like, let me use my resources because I’m a social worker, and I actually found the World Health Organization’s definition, and it just really resonated with me. They say that well-being encompasses quality of life and the ability of people and societies to contribute to the world with a sense of meaning and purpose. And I just thought that was like… They said it so well. How can I say it better? I just think it’s so important to understand both the impact of well-being on the individual, but also at the mezzo and the macro level.
Erin Gaines:
I guess my opinion on wellness, I think it’s deeply personal. And it’s kind of contextual based on the person, but it can vary individual to individual. But I think at its core, it’s really comes down to a person’s sense of happiness and self-worth and quality of life. I think wellness is so interesting. And I know we’re focusing kind of on emotional wellness on this, but it just has a wide range of factors that really kind of contribute to it, so external, like our view of self-worth or external things in our environment, physical health, emotional well-being, our social connections, even our spiritual fulfillment or job satisfaction, finances. I could go on and on, but I think due to how broad it is, it’s so difficult to measure it comprehensively, and it really comes down to a balance across these dimensions in our life and involves a pursuit of harmony and personal growth in all of those areas.
Sam Hobson:
I love this idea of a pursuit of harmony because how do we as individuals even measure our own well-being?
Erin Gaines:
Right.
Sam Hobson:
And I was like, besides, I don’t know, feeling good.
Erin Gaines:
Right.
Sam Hobson:
But this idea of a pursuit towards harmony, I think, really sort of gives us some type of tangible goal by which to measure well-being. How harmonious do I feel? How aligned, how grounded, how in tune with myself, with my community, with spirit,-
Erin Gaines:
Right.
Sam Hobson:
… with purpose do I feel? And I feel like that’s a really good metric.
Erin Gaines:
Definitely you might be thriving socially and notice you need more attention with your financial health or some other aspect too. And also giving yourself grace of, you don’t have to be 100% at each, but finding harmony what makes sense for you, for sure.
Sam Hobson:
Yeah, I feel like 100% at each is really scary.
Erin Gaines:
Feels intense.
Sam Hobson:
Yeah.
Erin Gaines:
Definitely.
Sam Hobson:
Yeah, I think I’d be okay with a solid 45 in each.
Erin Gaines:
Right. If I can get there, we’re in harmony and we’re good, definitely.
Sam Hobson:
What I got from both of y’all’s is that there are multiple dimensions to wellness and to well-being. And why do you think that is? Why is it so complicated? Is it something because we as humans are complicated and nothing is easy and nothing can be simple?
Erin Gaines:
The systemic part of it can make things so complex. So there are many things that may be within our control when it comes to our well-being, but there’s also a lot of things that could be out of our control. And so it’s just so complex in the sense that it really does vary from individual to individual of what needs matter, what they have access to or don’t have access to. And I think it makes it challenging in that way.
Sam Hobson:
Okay. Well, our goal here is to make it just a little less challenging for grad students here at Michigan, and the focus of today’s episode is on the emotional dimension of well-being. What do you think that looks like, particularly for grad students, and particularly for grad students here at Michigan?
Erin Gaines:
I think for graduate students, emotional well-being is more of an intentional practice that can be hard, and it’s not fun. It’s something that you have to do. And I remember I was so frustrated sometimes as a graduate student because I felt like the accessible information on self-care was kind of boiled down to take a bubble bath. And that was nice to do and it was nice to incorporate into the routine from time to time, but I just felt… During that time, I was struggling with so many other aspects in my life where they were really starting to be impacted by the stressors of grad school. So I think emotional self-care as a graduate student is creating social support systems, setting difficult boundaries to avoid burnout, developing coping skills to manage stress, like going to therapy if you can, or finding different resources, learning how to take breaks and budgeting. Finances are so hard and grad school particularly, and trying to figure out where that fits.
So I think the less glamorous but essential side of self-care as a grad student is kind of taking care of all of those areas of your life and making sure that it’s intentional, but just to kind of prevent burnout in that way. But it’s hard, and it’s not easy.
Taylor Pahl:
When I think of emotional well-being just more generally, I really think about it meaning that we can experience a lot of different emotions, we have a well-rounded emotional experience, but then we also have the confidence in our own abilities to cope with those difficult or challenging emotions.
And that takes time, right? It takes time to learn those skills. Sometimes we need additional supports to learn those skills. I know I… I didn’t grow up in a household where it’s like let’s do paced breathing, right?
Erin Gaines:
Right.
Taylor Pahl:
So I want to recognize and name that it’s not something that’s innate. It’s something that we have to actively learn and practice. But to practice emotional well-being, I think it means being able to have this well-rounded emotional life, knowing that it’s going to include difficult emotions at times, but that we know we can cope with them and that things will get better, and that we can reach out for support if we’re needing it. The only other thing I’d add about graduate student emotional well-being… Erin touched on so many important needs and the only thing I’d add to that is structure, right?
Erin Gaines:
Yeah.
Taylor Pahl:
I think having some sort of routine or structure, which I want to name is so hard as a grad student because your schedule can look so different day to day. But is there something maybe you could do in the mornings or something you can do in the evenings? Because having that little bit of sense of control over how we start our day or how we end our day can really impact our emotional well-being too.
Erin Gaines:
Absolutely. I want to be mindful too of not making it seem like self-care is daunting. I think just with anything as a grad student, and I know I’m speaking a lot personally for myself, but there’s just so much that you have to accomplish in a day that I think it’s pretty easy for you to forget taking care of yourself. So I think it’s more of-
Taylor Pahl:
Right.
Erin Gaines:
… that intentional practice of if you’re putting energy into school, you’re putting energy into working, bring some of that back to yourself too. That’s the intentional part of it. You have to be thinking of yourself as well.
Taylor Pahl:
I’m going to do a cliche, but you can’t pour from an empty cup. And so I think, especially like Erin shared, and I think I had a similar experience in grad school where it’s like you’re moving from one thing to the next to the next. And you’re in grad school for a reason, right? You’re not just like, “Oh, that sounds fun.”
Erin Gaines:
Right.
Taylor Pahl:
There’s a goal and there’s a purpose, and there’s a lot of pressures associated with it. So it’s like, hey, I’m either paying a lot of money to be here, or I worked really hard to be here. I need to get the most out of it, so I will focus solely on that and put myself on the back burner. And I think what we’re trying to say is that’s not sustainable.
Erin Gaines:
Yeah.
Taylor Pahl:
And also, if we’re doing that, we’re not showing up as our best selves in the first place. So grad school is already such an investment. Don’t we want to show up in a way that feels better for us? And I would argue, yeah. And if that means setting some of those boundaries, like Erin said, or just having some more intentional time for yourself, I think even small tweaks can make a significant change, at least in our outlook on emotional well-being when we’re in grad school.
Sam Hobson:
Okay. So what I’m hearing from y’all is that it’s not necessarily difficult in terms of impossible work and perhaps just difficult-
Erin Gaines:
Right.
Sam Hobson:
… in that these are not habits that we engage in regularly. And so building a new habit of any kind, whether it is going to the gym or reading seven minutes a day is difficult because it is not a muscle that we necessarily work and use and stretch on the regular. And so it just requires that intention, like you said behind it. Erin.
Erin Gaines:
Yeah, I love how you just expressed that too. It’s not a muscle that we normally work. It’s something that you have to practice and continue to grow. I really like that analogy for it.
Taylor Pahl:
I think we experienced so many external pressures already. We shouldn’t be pressuring ourselves to be more focused on our well-being, right? That sounds stressful. So also just recognizing that any care for our wellness is more than what we are probably doing before. And so having both compassion, but then also giving ourselves credit. I did some deep breathing the other day and I’ve not done it since, and that was probably Tuesday, but I was really proud of myself for doing it on Tuesday.
Erin Gaines:
I love that.
Taylor Pahl:
Right.
Erin Gaines:
Good for you.
Taylor Pahl:
Thank you. It was like five minutes, and I was like, let’s go. I’m a wellness guru now.
Sam Hobson:
Yeah, definitely. I want us to sort of, at the end of this episode, really wrap up with all of the small little things that can help to stretch and work and grow this muscle that are easy, that feel easeful and are incredibly accessible. And so we will get there. But before we get there, what are some of the things, especially because y’all have been one of us, not only grad students, but grad students here at Michigan, that you think can get in the way of emotional well-being, things that are underrated or unexpected in some way?
Erin Gaines:
I also want to be mindful of talking about how sometimes managing mental illness can make managing emotional and wellness difficult versus someone who may not be experiencing that. And so I think many graduate students are impacted by mental health like anxiety or depression. And by nature, those conditions do make it more challenging to put self-care into practice because they do impact our executive functioning and our emotional and physical functioning as well. Taylor and I also work in a program that educates middle and high school students about mental health, and we focus a lot on how anxiety and depression are real brain illnesses. It’s not just something that people have in their head, contrary to what stigma could say. And we show students that fMRI scans that scan your brain actually show that depression can lower brain activity. And so it’s not all in your head. It does make it really difficult to sometimes get to the things that you want to get to.
And so I think graduate students who may be living with a mental illness may need additional support, whether it’s therapy or medication management, or spending more time building up those coping skills. I do know that mental health care is not as accessible for everyone, and it can be really expensive too. And so I think additional barriers can come up with that, but I think every student just has different needs, and it’s important for us to be able to meet ourself where we are and be able to give ourself grace with what support we may be needing in grad school.
Taylor Pahl:
Yes, Erin. I co-sign everything you just said. Right? And in addition to that, something that I noticed as both a grad student at U of M, but now being staff and working with different parts of the university and grad students that are in different programs, one thing that I don’t think is necessarily wholly unique to U of M, but something that’s really stood out is just how siloed the different programs are, right? So in the school of social work, I was mostly with social work students, unless I actively chose to go engage with grad students from different programs, which rocks, but also, I think it can make it feel kind of difficult to navigate resources on campus or totally know where to go.
And with that too, it can just kind of feel isolating. I know it varies student to student, what your program looks like, but sometimes it can feel hard to find community. It can feel hard to know where to go if we feel like we aren’t doing our very best. And then let’s name the elephant in the room. The University of Michigan’s tagline is leaders and best, and that’s just a huge external pressure on top of already being in grad school, right? So I think that’s kind of unique to U of M, and I know that there’s a lot of work going on to change the culture around leaders and best to be more like leaders at their best, which I think refrains it a little bit.
So that’s what I think is unique to U of M, but one thing that I think doesn’t get talked about enough, at least in the open, but got talked about a lot when I was a grad student and I hear from current grad students is just financial stress. And I know this varies student to student, but that has a huge impact on emotional well-being, right? Grad school is an investment, and being in grad school is a monetary, as well as a time investment. And with that, we still have to meet our basic needs, we still have different responsibilities in our personal life, and we have to meet our program requirements. So I think that there needs to be more of a discussion on how financial stress really impacts grad students.
Sam Hobson:
And this has come up in other episodes with folks I’ve spoken with, just basically the interconnectedness and interrelatedness of all of the dimensions of well-being. Okay. So Taylor, with all of this sort of background that we have now on well-being and emotional well-being, what is Campus Mind Works? And what does it have to do with emotional well-being?
Taylor Pahl:
Campus Mind Works has really evolved over the years to include more general education about mental health and how it specifically impacts college students at all levels. We know there’s some similarities between undergrad, grad, postdoc, but there’s definitely differences as well. And we do this through our website, campusmindworks.org, where students are able to explore what we call identity-specific resources. Those who identify as a graduate student, there’s specific resources there, as international students, LGBTQ+ students, and more. And our website also provides education on specific mental illnesses, support resources, and tools like preparing for your first therapy appointment. Or even just keeping track of your mood, I think that can be really helpful. It also includes how to support a peer by expressing your concerns to them. So it’s really kind of a comprehensive website. And then in addition, we’re also able to support students’ emotional well-being through our monthly wellness groups that are available on central and north campus.
So we’re able to do these in-person wellness groups through partnerships with LS&A’s Newnan advisors and the College of Engineering’s Care Center. And shout out, we’re also getting virtual groups in addition to our in-person, and in addition to our awesome website. Can you tell I’m very passionate? All of our wellness group presentations are available asynchronously. And they’re like 30 minutes, so they’re pretty easy to access. So I think there’s a lot of different ways people can engage with Campus Mind Works and get some more support when it comes to their emotional Well-being.
Erin Gaines:
One thing that kind of comes to mind, I’m newer to Campus Mind Works, but it’s just been so awesome seeing students come and how they interact together. And so in one of our recent Campus Mind Works we had on anxiety, there were two students who actually opened up about loneliness on campus. And so they kind of had this candid conversation during the presentation, and they both ended up sharing contact information at the end of the presentation to keep in touch. And that was so powerful to me. It really showed that Campus Mind Works goes beyond just the education, but also just provides that safe space for students to build community and share resources together. And so I think that that’s also the potential of it too. There’s education, but we’re also building a community together.
Sam Hobson:
Yeah, that’s awesome. What I loved about what I heard from both of y’all is there’s support on how to support a peer. I think that is so cool. As a person who is community-minded, the idea of actual resources and support of this is how you can support your community better is, I think, not enough of a normative sort of approach to how we dispense resources, or even frame resources as well. And so I am excited. So Taylor, you have told us a bunch of resources that Campus Mind Works offers to students. What are the top two best ones that you think of?
Taylor Pahl:
So for me, and Erin’s story totally encompasses why, I think the wellness groups are the best. Personally, I think it’s an awesome time for people to connect while also learning hopefully more about mental health and potentially some coping skills they can walk away with. But after that, something that I think is really unique about our website is… I mentioned you can go and look at identity-specific resources, but there’s actually videos of real U of M students who hold those identities sharing their personal experience as say a graduate student. So for example, there’s one video. It’s with a former U of M grad student, Steph, and Steph shares her experience of realizing she was experiencing imposter syndrome, depression, and anxiety while she was in grad school. And grad school’s a lot on its own, let alone navigating mental health.
And so she really talked about how she both identified what she was experiencing, how she sought out help, and how she maintained her wellness after seeking help and through grad school. And so I just think hearing personal experiences is really impactful. We can relate to it. It really reduces the stigma and makes us realize like, okay, it’s not just me. Here’s someone else who has successfully completed grad school and maybe had similar experiences to what I’m having. So I would just recommend checking those out to people. I think I sometimes watch them and tear up because I’m like, “Oh, I know you and you’re so great. Thank you for sharing your story.” Right? I’m a little partial to those.
Sam Hobson:
Thank you. Thank you, Taylor. That sounded awesome. Erin, what are yours?
Erin Gaines:
Taylor and I like to incorporate a lot of emotional skill building activities and presentations to help students identify their preferred coping tools, and we also allow that space to be an area to practice those skills. So we also provide each student with a folder and it comes with resources where they can go to seek help, but also worksheets and things that they can spend on. And so our last presentation focused on teaching a variety of coping mechanisms that people could do, so deep breathing, or mindfulness and meditation, journaling, and then using that space as a way to practice that. Do you deep breathing? Do you not? Giving you some time to explore that. And I think in addition to that, and Taylor touched on this a little bit too, is on our website, there’s a lot of different skills listed that students can learn more about and kind of add to their emotional coping toolkit.
So I think that’s a great one, and also just overall reducing mental health stigma in that space. I think Campus Mind Works does a great job at being able to have students come together to talk about different mental health topics. And there’s just something really impactful about meeting, like you said, like-minded students who are willing to open up about mental health topics together. And it really normalizes our experiences that we may be ashamed to talk about and kind of know that we’re not alone, of like, okay, someone else maybe also be experiencing depression in grad school or someone else is also really struggling financially and being able to know that you’re not alone in those things as well.
Sam Hobson:
Those sound awesome. I was speaking with Joe Zichi of the well-being Collective, and we were talking about the iterative process that is discovering ourselves and figuring out what are the abilities, practices, strategies that work for me for my well-being. And so I loved it. It wasn’t just like, here’s deep breathing, you should try that, but also that you’re like, well do you even deep breathing? And the sort of experimentation that is required of figuring out how to harmonize with our well-being, I think, is just really cool, and I love that y’all incorporate that.
Taylor Pahl:
Totally. If I can just add too, you mentioned something like experimenting, and I think that’s the other thing, is just being open to trying new things, right? When people would talk to me about mindfulness in grad school, I’d be like, okay, I’m not some crunchy granola hippie. Please. It doesn’t work for me. But once I finally learned more about it and tried it, I realized, oh, okay, there’s a lot of aspects to mindfulness that I already do and are actually really effective. So I also just want to encourage people, be open to trying things, and maybe try it a couple times, right? You never know. Coping skills typically don’t work the very first time we try them. We have to practice them a little bit more too.
Sam Hobson:
That is definitely a message that I needed to receive. Sam, just because it didn’t work once doesn’t mean that you should throw it out the window. I really like the informality that you have noted about Campus Mind Works because know that CAPS can feel intimidating, but you want to do something, and a lot of times, CAPS is what you’re told to do. And so this idea is like, “No, no, no, welcome. Come in. We’ll guide you. We’ll support you. Here’s a cup of tea.” This is how it sounds to me.
Erin Gaines:
I love that.
Taylor Pahl:
No tea, but we do have lunch. So if anyone wants free lunch, join us.
Sam Hobson:
Even better.
Taylor Pahl:
Yeah.
Sam Hobson:
So having been grad students here yourselves, do either of you have any strategies, tips, tricks, any of the small things that we were talking about earlier that can make emotional well-being more accessible for current grad students here?
Erin Gaines:
Don’t be afraid to ask for support and to really follow through with seeking support and showing up for yourself in that way. Taylor just summarized there’s so many resources that the school offers, and taking advantage of that, being able to see what fits for you and what doesn’t. And I think, yeah, sometimes CAPS, it can feel really intimidating, and maybe you try it and you don’t like it, but allowing yourself to explore what is available to me. I think it might be difficult maybe to find the time, or even motivation to go, but I think setting a goal, even kind of starting with a smaller step. Explore. Maybe this semester I’ll explore at least one program that could be helpful to me. And maybe it’s not CAPS, but maybe a part of my emotional well-being is physically, I want to move more. What resources are available for that? To really just start building out your own toolkit of resources because you will need it as a grad student to take care of yourself. So I think the biggest thing, show up for yourself and take advantage of the resources that are available to you.
Taylor Pahl:
I just want to highlight the willingness to just try some new things. It might be pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone, but that might be necessary, right? Sometimes we need to do that. The other thing that I think is so paramount as a grad student, and I also want to recognize that this is easier said than done, but finding your community. I think grad school can be really isolating, which is wild to say because surrounded by so many people all the time. U of M is humongous. But I know when I was a grad student, I struggled to find my community. And I didn’t want to go up to someone and be like, “Hey, I’m having a hard time finding community. Can you help me?”
Erin Gaines:
Right.
Taylor Pahl:
But also, after I left grad school, I found out so many people were in the same boat as me. So recognizing that we have to put in an effort to find that community, whether it means maybe joining a student or joining some sort of league, exploring one of the many programs or resources at campus, just figuring out how to find a community. And I said on campus. It can be off campus too. I think really exploring our interests, but having that support is critical to our emotional. And on top of that, really being open to trying out different resources on campus. I know I’ve talked about wellness coaching. There’s Wolverine Support Network, which is more of a peer-to-peer based support system.
And lastly, again, I know this is like duh Taylor, but grad students have such varying schedules that sometimes we feel like we’re going all over the place in one day, but trying to find some opportunities to create some structure. We all lived through COVID. Not having structure and routine has such a huge impact on our emotional well-being, negative impact on our emotional well-being. So finding ways to build in even small structure into maybe our mornings or our evenings, I think can really go a long way. And that’s also, like Erin said earlier, intentional practice of taking care of ourselves. And not just a bubble bath, but eating three meals a day, drinking enough water, going to bed at a reasonable time, these sorts of things.
Sam Hobson:
Definitely. Thank you. If it isn’t too much to ask, would y’all be a little vulnerable with us here and share if y’all have any practices to bring structure to your days, to your mornings, or your evenings?
Taylor Pahl:
That’s a great question.
Erin Gaines:
Yeah. No, it is a good question. It is vulnerable in a sense, but also being able for us to also talk about what strategies we use. I think I’m definitely not perfect in my coping practices, but I think one thing that sometimes can be kind of helpful for me is I’m just a very… I’m routine kind of focused person, so kind of making sure that I have structure throughout my day, planning things out, planning my tasks. I’m a to-do list person, which may be your thing or not your thing, but it helps me stay focused and stay on track. I think sometimes also, I even learned this in grad school too, and Taylor talked about this as well, but focusing on my basic needs. What do I need throughout the day to take care of myself? I listen to my body. Am I feeling hungry? How can I nurture my body.
If my body’s telling me I need to move, being intentional about going to a workout class or the gym, or taking a walk. This may sound silly, but my dog Blue, he is so sweet. And sometimes just if you’re having a rough day, being able to rely on, can I walk my dog, or can I give him a hug or something? Focusing on the simple things that make a difference for me can be really helpful. And again, not perfect with the practices, but try and really listen to my body and my mind and focus day by day.
Sam Hobson:
Erin, you never have to be perfect.
Erin Gaines:
Yes. Yes. 45%.
Sam Hobson:
45%.
Taylor Pahl:
I think for me specifically, I love coffee. I wake up and I make myself a cup of coffee, and I walk my dog. And that happens every morning when I wake up, and I always make sure I have enough time in the morning to do it. I want to recognize some of that’s a privilege, right? I have a pretty kind of typical routine. But I think as a grad student, really saying, okay, if I can wake up around the same time each day and go to bed around the same time each day… I’m not saying exactly. I get things happen, there’s deadlines, but if we can get kind of a typical sleep wake time, and then with that, something that we can start our day with and end our day with. So for me, it’s the coffee and the walk with my dog. And either I listen to music or a podcast, or nothing, right? Sometimes you need nothing early in the morning. But that’s my me time, and then I know what my typical day is going to look like.
And then in the evening, this is not actually recommended, but I listen to my favorite comfort shows on Netflix-
Sam Hobson:
Oh yeah.
Taylor Pahl:
… or whatever, Hulu, and I have it next to me, and I go to bed listening to it because that’s just a comfort that I have. Don’t look at the screen, blue light’s bad for you, it’s not good for your sleep hygiene, et cetera, et cetera. But those are just two things that I do for myself that’s time for myself. And no matter how busy I am, I can typically do those two things.
Sam Hobson:
I appreciate that. Thank you, y’all. I will share mine because I don’t think it’s fair-
Taylor Pahl:
Yes.
Sam Hobson:
… to just ask y’all to be vulnerable without me fulfilling the prompt as well. Let’s see. So I’ve tried so many things. I’ve tried to fill all of my day with everything, and then I end up creating unsustainable goals, and then feeling like a failure for not achieving them. But I’ve sort of finally settled on something that’s accessible for me, and also flexible enough that I can add other things if there’s more time. So I wake up, I do my affirmations, I try to stretch my body. Because I used to try to do a whole workout routine, and now I’ve limited it down to stretching. And it’s not a particular type of stretching. It is simply whatever movement my hips or my back or my elbows are saying that they need at the moment. That is what I give it just to get the cricks out, I guess.
Erin Gaines:
Definitely. Move your body, get the day started.
Sam Hobson:
Yeah. Yeah. I have a cup of tea almost every morning, unless I’m rushing. And then I haven’t planned time like Taylor. I try to meditate almost daily. And it used to be like, oh, 30 minutes, yes. And then that was completely and totally unsustainable, and then I felt horrible every time I wasn’t able to get 30 minutes in every day. And so now, it is five minutes. And if I can do five minutes, if I can do one minute, if I can do 30 seconds, I try to celebrate all of those. Those are mine.
Taylor Pahl:
I love that. And if I could just name two, you did something that I think is also so important for all of us, self-compassion. While you were sharing what you do, you’re like, sometimes it’s five minutes, sometimes it’s one minute, sometimes it’s 30 seconds, and that’s more than nothing. And I think that’s so important when we’re focusing on our well-being, right? Life’s hard enough. We don’t need to be harder on ourselves about our emotional well-being, right?
Sam Hobson:
Yeah. Right.
Taylor Pahl:
That makes it even harder.
Sam Hobson:
Yeah. No, that honestly took me years to get to this point, years, but it is so nice on the other side. It feels so good.
Erin Gaines:
Well, it shows you showed up for yourself. You did the intentional practice. And I think you used the word experimenting earlier. You experimented and you figured out what worked for you, and that’s awesome.
Sam Hobson:
Thank you. I appreciate that, y’all. Okay. So before we go, is there anything else you’d like to share with our community about emotional well-being or well-being in general for grad students?
Taylor Pahl:
Nobody’s well-being is perfect. Y’all, we’re talking about 100% in every category, feels so overwhelming. Totally. Right? Any intentional practice that we put in towards our well-being is awesome, right? Anything is better than nothing. And let’s just be real, grad school has enough pressure on its own. We don’t need to be adding pressure. So just really being compassionate with ourselves and trying our best, not our hardest, is I think one of my biggest pieces of advice. And then lastly, I can’t say this enough, and I think Erin’s touched on it throughout today, but if you are struggling, please reach out to someone that you trust, on-campus resources like CAPS, or you can always call or text 988. There is help available, and you do not have to be going through difficult times alone. So I just want to stress that asking for help is always a sign of strength, and help is available if you are struggling.
Erin Gaines:
Whatever you’re going through, whatever is impacting your mental health, whatever reason is valid. I think sometimes that stops a lot of people from seeking support, of it’s not a good enough reason to seek support or I need to wait until it’s a crisis. It’s okay to work through taking care of yourself and preventing a crisis. It doesn’t matter where you’re at, but you’re not alone. And meet yourself halfway, and the resources are there to fill the rest of that.
Sam Hobson:
Yes, I love that. You said earlier, meet yourself where you are, and I think that that is what I’m getting from both of y’all. Definitely, with self-compassion, something that will go a long way. Definitely. Okay. Erin, Taylor, thank you so, so much for your time and your wisdom and your presence here with us today. It has been such a pleasure and such an honor.
Taylor Pahl:
Thank you so much, Sam. And I just want to shout out if anyone has any questions or interest in Campus Mind Works, they’re welcome to email myself or Erin with any of those comments or questions.
Sam Hobson:
Okay. Here are three takeaways and something small that you can do towards your emotional well-being right now. One, drop in on Campus Mind Works, monthly wellness groups, soon to be both in-person and virtual. They’ll help you build your emotional skills, normalize your experiences, and figure out which wellness strategies work best for you. Two, check out campusmindworks.org for identity-specific resources and videos from graduate students who are going through the same things that you are. And three, remember that our emotional well-being is about being intentional, not perfect. So try something small, try something different, and give yourself more grace than you think you deserve.
Speaking of something small, next time you’re on north or central campus, try to stop by a wellness zone in Michigan Union or Pierpont Commons. They have massage chairs, seasonal effective lights, meditation tools, and other wellness resources that I’m sure can help. You can find all of these links and more at rackham.umich.edu/gradwell. Please email us with any questions at [email protected], and make sure to join us next time when I chat with John Muckler from the College of Engineering about environmental well-being. See you then.
Hey, hardworking grad student. Thank you for tuning in to GradWell. I hope you can take something away from this episode with you. If you like what you heard, be sure to write a review, like, and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. For more information, check us out on social @umichgradschool.
